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Episode 19: Ankle Biters

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Three feet tall/Two inch fangs!! Three feet tall/Two inch fangs!!

Yes, that is the world famous mantra of Indie Film Cafe’s latest stinkfest, known as Ankle Biters – because there’s a gang of midget vampires and they can only reach your ankles, get it?  Actually, they prove they can pull down fully grown adult men and then bite them, but why do they have to bite them on the ankles???  There aren’t baby vampires (I wish!).  I dunno, but if yer looking for some hot and heavy midget vampire action (and honestly, who isn’t?), then this moovie has…well, some,  Moostly its about this grumpy anti-hero part-vampire named Drexel who is trying to stop the lil’ guys from making a full-sized vamp from a gem in a plastic sword, because lil’ vamps can only turn midgets into vampires – who knew that?

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We is Fierce!  Now Gimme Yer Ankles!

So Drexel (played by Writer/Director/Producer Adam Minarovich) and his little buddy T-Bone join force with some other dudes who also want to kill vampires (can’t we all just get along?) for reasons – the moovie is so dark and the sound is so dim we are sure things happen for some kind of reason, we’ll just be darned if we know what they are.  Under-developed, lacking humor, and suffering from some fairly bad post production, check out the Indie Film Cafe folks as they moan and groan their way through this gem in their latest PODCAST.

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These fake fangs hurt!

Well, these guys might be small, but they are big on the stink scale!  Moody awarded this flick an 8, while Just Jenn and the MooCow gave it 8.5s, for a total stink core of 25!  The MooCow might have awarded the film a bit moore, but he fell asleep into his massively buttered popcorn towards the end.

Stinky Score 8

We’ve got trailerage right HERE!  To git yer hooves on a dvd copy for your very own self, check out AMAZON , or sometimes they have it at BULL MOOSE.  And check out Adam Minarovich’s udder stinky classic Wiseguys VS Zombies for moore fun!  And of course you can see him in on AMC’s the Walking Dead.  And for those of you who simply cannot get enough of that slammin’ Ankle Biters theme song (you know who you are!), we present it to you HERE, in all its glory.

Ok, Ankle Biters might be a stinky midget vampire flick, but don’t sell it short – give it a little chance, and it just might work its way into your heart!
;=8)

 

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