Uncategorized

Episode 123: Rectuma (2003)

I mean, c’mon: its a whole moovie about butt jokes, and butts, and farts, and poo, and buttocks, and taints, and, well, huge hairy bottoms. What cud possibly go wrong with a moovie like that? Well, check out the latest wacky episode of Indie Film Cafe, where Moody, the MooCow, and special guest co-host actress Jackey Hall grab out butts and check out this bizarre, over the top ass-muncher of a moovie, and see what the all the hubbub is about! ;=8)

When you know yer in for a good time…

It cud be a whole lot better in Waldo Williams’ world: his wife is cheating on him, his weird friends at work are making life difficult, and, to make matters infinitely worse, when he goes on vacation with his wife to add a lil moore sparkle back into the relationship he ends up getting but-raped by a bad CGI Mexican Butt-Humping Bullfrog. You know, as you do. THEN, his wife tries to kill him, he gets radiation poisoning from a bad Japanese scientist, and then his BUTT GROWS HUGE AND STARTS TO DESTROY THE WORLD!!!
:=8O

Cow cud you not love a story like that??? :=8D

Well, ok, let’s take a breath here. The acting is…a bit over the top. I know, shocking. The comedy is very hit or miss. Moostly miss. And the FX are…well, less that special. Mark Pirro is the Writer, Producer, and Director, and he’s given the world such stinky classics as A Polish Vampire in Brooklyn, Curse of the Queerwolf, and Nudist Colony of the Dead, so we know what we’re getting ourselves into. BUTT he has never graced the world with such a story as this before, in fact no one has! I dunno cow Alfred Hitchcock passed up the chance to write a moovie about a guy who has to run around and prove his innocence by sowing that his RECTUM is responsible for the murders around town, and not him. You so missed yer chance, Hitchy!

Yes, ALL of this stuff happens!

Waldo is played by the awesome Bill Devlin whom we know from such films as Factory Accident Sex, 12/12/12, and the spectacularly bad and udderly mooovelous Blood Predator, and his skills go a loooong way to making this moovie a lot of fun! Jean Black plays a Clarice Starling wanna-be detective, Tyrone Dubose plays messed-up buddy Johnny Pecks, and good ol’ Michael R. Thomas (Bite Me!, Dr. Horror’s Erotic House of Idiots, Spiderbabe) plays Wanger, a sort of Lone Chaney Jr as a werewolf wanna-be. So loads of folks we know very well indeed, and this moovie did not disappoint. Silly, wacky, and thoroughly without any good taste whatsoever, this is the perfect stinker to plop on after a hard day at work when you just wanna turn your brain to DH and have a fun time with yer friends. Because we all love dopey schoolboy butt humor, deep down inside, so why not wallow in it once in a while! ;=8)

GAHHHHH!!!! MY BUTTOCKS!!!! :=8O

Well, the votes are in, and as expected Rectuma scored pretty low, because EVERYONE loves butt humor! Moody went with a 4, MooCow scored it a 3.5, and Ms. Jackey Hall awarded her lowest score EVER on this show with a 2, giving the unstoppable Rectuma a total Stink Score of 9.5, and that’s a Stinky Average of only 3.2! On the Ladder of Stink this moovie nestles in quite nicely right between Sledgehammers at Dawn and both Bite Me! and White Wolves. Cow a-butt that!!
:=8D

We gots yer trailerage right HERE. And you can see the first 9 minutes for free on Youtube! And yes, you can stream it on Tubi! If yuo wanna git yer mitts on a physical copy, but the DVD from Mark Pirro himself on his website! It comes with director’s commentary, behind the scenes footage, highlights of its 2003 premiere, theatrical trailer and four tv spots! You can also get it from Amazon, Grindhouse Video, and re-sale on Ebay. There is no blu ray yet, BUTT they are working on remastering the film, hopefully for a buttload of HD releases soon! Git the digital poster at Cinematerial.com! Git the colorful Japanese poster also at Cinematerial.com! Git an oooo-riginal vintage poster right from Mark Pirro himself on his website! And EBAY has one autographed by the man himself! You can get the actual Ass Plugger 2000 prop from the moovie!!! You can get Hi and Nee’s red dresses too! and $1500 bucks will git you the ORIGINAL Giant Butt prop from the moovie itself!!!! There’s udder stuff from the moovie on Mark Pirro’s site too, check it out!
:=8D

Its a giant killer butt!

Well, here at Indie Film Cafe, we love big ol’ butts, and we cannot lie, and we love big, weird, stinky Giant Butt moovies too, to take our word for it and go see Rectuma if yer looking for weird, silly, stinky fun!
:=8D

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s