Episode 122: Toad Warrior (1996)

Save us Max Hell, SAVE US!!!! And save us, Donald G. Jackson, from Boring Hollywood Remake Hell, as only you and Scott Shaw can! PLUS, special guest appearance by Joe Estevez, Conrad Brooks, and everyone’s favorite plastic purple gator, ROLLER GATOR!!! Yep, this episode has it all, and Moody, the MooCow, and special guest co-host Johnny Johnson are here to talk about this post-apocalyptic desert ‘everybody’s wearing sunglasses for no apparent reason’ classic Toad Warrior, only on Indie Film Cafe!

Toad! I’ll chop those legs and have ’em for dinner!

In a grim, desolate future America, the world has been wiped out by the Toad Plague, and only MAX HELL can save the last of humanity from the evil clutches of Estevez‘s Mickey O’ Malley and his goon squad of…well, poorly costumed frogs left over from Hell Comes to Frogtown, and a few hot chicks with swords. I mean, there are far worse ways to go, know what I mean? Oh yeah, Conrad Brooks and Roller gator pop in for a cameo too. Max Hell is Scott Shaw‘s sun glasses-toatin’, samurai sword-fightin’, black suit in the blazing sun wearin’ version of Max Rockatansky from the Mad Max franchise, sort of the Dollar Store version. But its ok, Dollar Store Max Hell is pretty darn fun too, and you won’t mind the bad costumes, tarps used as caves, cheap plastic guns, or any of the udder budget issues surrounding this film because, as usual, Shaw and Jackson somecow manage to make these desert sand-poor moovies fun and enjoyable and interesting.

Dunno where this came from but LET”S USE IT!!!

The story behind this one is a doozie, since apparently, according to Scott Shaw himself, this cut of the film was not up to their lofty standards and was not supposed to be released, and then someone sold it anycow, and released it anyways – hate it when that happens! Anycow, the real version of this film is actually called Max Hell: Frog Warrior, and it is a fairly different cut from this film, and is probably a better film – but we still kind of like this cheaper, stinkier version, moostly because it was the only one we had at the studio! There is also a First Cut version of the film called the Zen Cut, which I is dying to check out as well! And don’t forget, snuggle X-rated actress Jill Kelly is in here too!

Anytime you team up Donald G. Jackson and Scott Shaw with Joe Estevez, yer gonna come up with B moovie gold – now you toss in Conrad Brooks and Baby Gator as well, heckers you’ve got B moovie PLATINUM! John Johnson absolutely loved this flick, while Moody and the MooCow also enjoyed it, although they also pointed out the film’s many stinky bona fides too. This flick got a 6 from Moody, an 8 from the MooCow, and, for an Indie Film Cafe FIRST, a -1 from John Johnson, because he liked the film soooo much he wanted it to score well. That gives Toad Warrior an overall Stink Score of 13, and that’s a Stinky Average of 4.3 – on the Ladder of Stink, Toad Warrior nestles in right below Vampire’s Kiss, and right above Now You Know and Polymorph.

Well, since this was not supposed to be released, there is no trailer of this version of the film, although there is one for Max Hell: Toad Warrior right HERE. And you can check out that Zen First Cut HERE as well. There is also a short, B&W SILENT moovie version of this film as well, because you just can’t get enough Max Hell VS Froggies! And for the love of god, hie thee hither to Scott Shaw’s amazing website, it is LOADED with tons of great stuff, including a whole section devoted to the history of Toad Warrior! From there you can get the Streaming version from Kunaki.com, and also stream it through Amazon Prime. Good luck finding it on DVD though, the only place this cow knows of is as part of a 4-pack compilation dvd called Girls From Another World, which is both expensive and out of print, and is moost likely the group who bootlegged the unofficial version from Jackson and Shaw in the first place. It also has Roller Gator and Big Sister 2000, which are also Shaw/Jackson classics, but its always best to get those moovies from the authentic source, if possible. There is no mech or schwag with this film either, I am sorry to say, but do check out the Shaw website for stuff related to Max Hell Frog Warrior, and get it all from there.

I mean, c’mon…we all need a little moore Conrad Brooks and Baby Gator in our lives, right??

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