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Episode 60: Mutant Vampire Zombies from the Hood (2008)

It’s a mootant! It’s a zombie!! Its a vampire!!! Its…from da Hood! Its all three at once in this weird, mixed-up mash-up of a moovie, cowbining undead flesheaters, undead blood drinkers, semi-undead sex perverts, street gangs, cops, and pretty mooch anything else you can think of. Sh@* be kickin’, yo. Word. And if your mission in life was to hear and see C. Thomas Howell try to speak like a woke streetwise gangsta, mission accomplished! Check out the latest Indie Film Cafe episode to hear what the IFC kids are moaning about this time – special guest stinker reviews include actress Kenzie Philips and make-up artist McKenzie Kelly join original host Jonathan Moody as they discuss this wacky stinker!

Dude, I gots NO idea what’s going on in this picture…

So, overnight the world goes kablooey because a solar flare came too close and everyone not underground or in a lead shielded building (like out cops-n-thugs main characters, cowveniently) becomes…well, its never really clear exactly what is going on. Some folks are traditional zombies, some become vampires, some become vampire-zombie hybrids, and some become a sort of half-dead, half-alive breed of sex mootants. Dat was some solar flare! Also cars no longer work (which keeps the budget lower), although tv stations set up in personal homes do , which is odd when you cowsider the opposite would happen during a real solar flare. But we’re not in the world of science and logic here, folks, trust me.

Our unlikely protagonists include the leftovers of a pair of rival drug gangs, one Asian and one African-American, and the one cop (C. Thomas Howell) dumb enough to get himself stuck with them. They pick up a few random characters along the way, though mainly they are red shirt character, there to become zombie munchies and/or rape victims. Its a forced buddy zombithon with the cop and the leaders of each gang. Across town there is a professor (Gregory Allen Williams) who is broadcasting from his home because he knows stuff , and his hot white scientist daughter (Johanna Watts) , who are trying to get people to come to his place because, well, he knows stuff – clearly he hasn’t been watching the Walking Dead to know that in a zombapocalype it isn’t the dead you have to worry about so much as the living. The one group tries to get to the other group, and shenanigans occur. Thunder Levin (“Soulmates”, “American Warships”, “AE: Apocalypse Earth”) directs.

Ok, shoot that one, and that one, and that one. Ohh, and THAT one!

There is a lot of dumb stuff that happens in this film, too many to recownt here, and some pretty crappy acting as well – but some of the special effects were decent, and our reviewer enjoyed both the zombie/creature effects and some of the concepts behind them. The MooCow loves the scene where the leader of the African-American gang ( Tyshawn Bryant) hears his buddy cry out while they’re in the building, and recognizes him by name instantly, but then they have to walk blocks around to find him dying in the gutter. Way to project your voice! Continuity Monkey had his fuzzy paws full in this film!

Sooo, are you dudes zombies, or vampire, or zombie-vampires, or sex perverts, or what, tryin’ to figure shit out…

And the votes are in, and the IFC kids think this moovie is pretty stinky, although not as stinky as it cud have been. Ms. Kenzie gave the film a 9, while Ms. McKenzie gave it a solid 7; Moody split the scores, awarding the flick an 8, giving “Mutant Vampire Zombies from the Hood” a Stink Total of 24, and a Stink Average of 8 – that’s an odoriferous stinker!

:=8D

We got yer trailerage right HERE. You can buy a dvd copy on Amazon. And you can check it out on Tubi. DVD copies also pop up from time to time on EBAY. Worst comes to worst, you can always pick up a copy at Wally World. If yer a die hard fan, CafePress.com has a tee shirt, a hoodie, and a baseball cap with the logo of this film plastered all over it, to show the world your love of the film. Word.

Gimme dat nom-nom!!!

Well, if you want something at least slightly different from the usual zombie blaxpoitation hood films that are already out there (“Zombies in the Hood”, “Zombie Hood”, “Zombyz”), and yer into some C. Thomas Howell ridiculousness, then “Mutant Vampire Zombies from the Hood” is the stinker you want to git yer hooves on, most def!

:=8D

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