The Indie Film Cafe Movie Reviews!

Hey everyone welcome to Season 7… It’s your buddy Jonathan Moody to kick things off! The first episode of the new season we did through Zoom. I think we were still having problems getting people to the studio. A problem we still have. In this episode we reviewed the film, “Dead & Rotting” a JR Bookwalter produced film from 2002. Jonathan was able to get Paul for every episode of this season – don’t count that exactly for Season 8. However, we did have one of the best guests we’ve ever had which was Spooky Madison. Since this NEW episode though she has been extremely busy and we are very fortunate we got her when we could.

What is “Dead & Rotting” about you may ask. Let’s see how IMDB describes it:
Three prankster buddies release the wrath of an aged witch, Abigail, when they unwittingly become accomplices to the murder of her son. Scheming in anger, the witch seduces the three friends and then uses the men’s own ill-born spawn to destroy them. Death and rot are left in the wake…
Okay that pretty much sums it up.

Yeah, I got careless with the raspberry jam, so sue me, who cares, I’m dead!

The film was written by David P Barton and Doug Snauffer, and directed by Barton. This is the only film that David directed but he’s done make up fx for movies such as Starship Troopers, The Usual Suspects, Apocalypto and Face/Off. Doug has written other films such as Witchouse 2: Blood Coven, The Vault, Fiendish Fables, and Shriekshow.

As for the cast… we have some really fun genre names in this cast including: Stephen O’Mahoney (Roswell, Murdercycle, Mega Scorpions), Tom Hoover (Polymorph, Chickboxer, Galaxy of Dinosaurs), Debbie Rochon (Slime City Massacre, Exhumed, Model Hunger), Trent Haaga (Terror Firmer, Killjoy 2, Dr. Horror’s Erotic House of Idiots), and Jeff Dylan Graham (Fell, Zombiegeddon, Home Sick). Plus many more actors in the cast. I enjoyed the acting overall.

“Wanna see my definition of ‘disarming’, keep on grabbing…”

Warning though: there is a scene involving the death of an animal, but it’s really what sets the stage for the rest of the movie. Without it most of what happens wouldn’t have happened. But for an animal lover like myself it was very sad. Maybe this goes to show people don’t mess with a witch’s pet cause they might be more than just their pet. That’s all I’ll say about that. I don’t really wanna spoil anything because it’s a movie I believe everyone should go out and watch online.

David P. Barton is not a bad filmmaker by any means and especially for his first film he did a pretty good job. I know there were a few complaints we had, and a lot of that usually has to do with the writing. In my opinion, you’re only as good as the script on the page. We’ve def seen worse but we have also def seen a lot better. If you know us our biggest problems are can we see it and can we hear it. If those two aspects are being questioned we start to go higher on the Stinkometer.

Speaking of which, here are the scores that we gave…

I gave it a 4 because I really did enjoy it. It’s a movie I put on from time to time just because I’m a fan of everyone involved in the production. And to me it’s one of those movies that I can put on and it will inspire me to want to go out and make something. Paul gave it a 5. He found the movie to be more meh. Not horrible but he def saw the potential in it to be better, especially with the group. And Spooky well she gave it the highest stink rating… 5.5. She thought it was a bit stinkier than we did but not nearly as bad as I think she was expecting – especially after I’ve shown her one that was sooooo bad. This one was at least more competent. The total Stink Score was 14.5, which is a Stinky Average of 4.8. Not too shabby for the first episode of Season 7. That puts it up with Ghost House, Savage Beach, and Fire City: End of Days. Which pretty much makes sense.

Well that’s it for this one. I’ll be the next one as well since it was another one of my picks.. Zombie Pirates! We’ll see how well that did. Next up though Paul will take you through how to find this flick… Take it away, MooCow!

Moo! We’re back for Season 7!
:=8D
Well, we gotst trailerage for Dead and Rotting right HERE. You can watch it for freeee on the Tube of You at Horror Central! It is also on Tubi, so go check it out there! Want the physical media – who doesn’t?? Well Uncle Amazon has a Special Edition DVD! And you can still get the regular dvd version there too. No Blu Ray as of yet, unforch. In the re-sale market you can find it on Ebay and also at The Beat Goes On.com. Wildside Press has a two-fer DVD with Stiches which looks like a keeper! That version is on Amazon too. Its also featured on the Advantage Collection 10 moovie cowllection dvd, as well as the Blood Soaked Cinema 12 moovie dvd, so check those out too! No merch that I cud find, but there are a number of reviews to check out, including Flipside Movie Emporium, Silver Emulsion.com, and the Full Moon Band Blogspot. A video review is on the Dollar Bin of Doom section of Miserable Hair People at Youtube, and the Robjoenfriendsshow.

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Episode 170: Sins of the Fleshapoids (1965)

May 30, 2025May 30, 2025 The MooCow

And finally the Indie Film Cafe kids have come to the end of Season 6, and we’re going out with a bang with the classic weird cult indie film from maverick moovie maker Mike Kuchar, yeah we’re talkin’ Sins of the Fleshapoids. WOW! This is certainly a…well, a moovie. So what exactly is a Fleshapoid, and why is dey so sinsful?? Well, stay tuned to the latest episode of Indie Film Cafe, wherein Moody, the MooCow, and long-suffering Just Jenn chop it up about this wild and weird mid-sixties udderground flick – check it out! :=8D

Absolutely no bees around my Queen B’s, please!

Its the weird, sexy robot revolution, 1960’s style, where humans in the very far future following a “Great War” are both lazy as hell and make extremely questionable fashion choices. They rely on their Fleshapoid andriod-robot thingies to do everything for them (ya know, kinda like white folks use brown folks today…), somewhere between slaves, servants, and/or tools – except they has feelings too, all of the feels, and when they get riled up, well, we’re not talkin’ Terminator terrors but there is a whole lot of weird helmet wearing goin’ on.

Behold! My futuristic Interpretive DAAAANCING!!!!

So, wherein Fleshapoid Xar, played by Bob Cowen (Attack of The The Eye Creatures, The Sky Socialist, The Devil’s Cleavage) – who is also the Narrator – revolts against his human handler to hook up with Melenka, a female Fleshapoid because, well, when a mommy fleshapoid and a daddy fleshapoid love each other very much….
Anycow, this does not sit well with Prince Gianbeno (George Kuchar, Mike’s director brother) and Princess Vivianna, played by Donna Kerness (The Naked and the Nude, Pussy on a Hot Tin Roof, Lust for Ecstasy, The Devil’s Cleavage), and things and stuff happen. Now, the Princess is a naughty little monkey because she has a secret lover named Ernie (and who doesn’t?) , forming a sort of weird mid century modern underground love triangle, but the Prince gets red hot about all this, so that Xar and Melenka have to kill them, and then have sexy robot naked time and produce a cute lil toy robot that wanders right the heck outta Melenka’s….ummm…Fleshapoid cave. The heck??? :=8o

Wow! If you like yer sci-fi sex romps to be cheap, weird, overly-stylistic, and with barely any nudity, but with robo-husbandry, then this strange little flick is right up your dark, scary alley. The visuals were at the same time dark and grainy and hard to make out, while also being vividly and jarringly super saturated with color; the moosic was interesting but also rather pompous and bombastic; the acting ranged from wooden to fairly cowvincing at times, and the direction just seemed a step up from yer typical Nick Zed cheap-o stinkfest at times, while at udder times there were some very interesting shot selections. There’s something here for everybody! Add in the fact that this moovie has a HUGE udderground following, to say nothing of a rather notorious campy reputation, this little gem of a moovie helps put the fartsy in artsy! And its under an hour long with no dialogue! :=8D

I must wear my Helmet of Fleshapoidery with pride, pride I say!

Well, the votes are in, folks, and Sins of the Fleshapoids comes in with a 6.5 from the MooCow, a 7.5 from Moody, and amazingly Just Jenn went with a 5! That gives this moovie a Stink Total of 19, which is a Stinky Average of 6.3. On the Ladder of Stink that score has it tied with Bigfoot Wars, which is quite interesting as it is the lowest scoring season ending moovie yet! You know that both Andy Warhol and John Waters loved this flick… ;=8)

Well, here is your weird trailer for a weird film. You can buy the DVD from Uncle Amazon right HERE. You can also order it from Re-Voir.com. You can also find it on the re-sale market at places like Ebay. You can check out a cheap, grainy version for free at the Internet Archive.com if you can’t buy yer own copy.

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Episode 169: Super Badass (1999)

May 2, 2025May 8, 2025 The MooCow

Ya know, back in the 70’s super-violent revenge fantasy flicks were all the rage – who’da thought they would make a come-back in the late 1990’s?? Well, maybe not all the way back, but you can’t blame Chales E. Cullen for trying! Yes sir, on the latest episode of Indie Film Cafe, our boys Moody, the MooCow, and special guest co-host Joe Turek are cowfronted by a city (sort of, its Roanoke, VA) awash in crime and scum and violence – and the only way to get rid of it is to become…well, a scummy violent criminal. You gotta join ’em if you wanna beat ’em! This wacky, over-the-top indie has it all, but is it enough to impress the IFC Kids? Well let’s just take a look, shall we?

Uhhh, this does not bode well…what is that???

As you might recall, the cinematic underworld populated by the likes of one Charles E. Cullen,the audacious auteur outta Roanoke, VA, is not unknown to the IFC kids – the MooCow’s arm STILL hurts from where Paige punched it after watching Curse of the Mummy Cat, so expectations were pretty low, I gotst to tell ya. COWever, the MooCow has faith in Mr. Cullen, and he did not disappoint with this whackadoodle crime/revenge flick, wherein, dressed as a mime, he battles the Boogeyman, Bucko the Clown, the Lightbulb, AND has to deal with motorcycle ridin’ skull face Death – whew, that is a day’s work in the crazy town of Roanoke!

Luring young, unsuspecting girls into murder? Just Bucko being Bucko…

Its a crazy, violent shoot-up full of bad taste, child murder, decapitations, rocket launchers, drunken singing, blazing effin’ guns, and moar blood than you cud shake the proverbial stick at – but its also filmed in a fun, stylish manner that surprised some of our IFC kids, and even elevates the material somewhat? I mean if you can enjoy Charles Bronson blowing away some punks cow can you not watch super bounty hunter Super Badass kill some crazy ass villains and clowns. Ughhh, that Bucko the Clown will live in my nightmares! Oh, and there’s a puppet or two as well, because Cullen. AND, dig those 60’s & 70’s swirling colors and that awesome soundtrack! This B moovie is a Queen B!!! :=8D

Well, its clear that this flick took some of the IFC kids for a loop, and they were surprised at cow good this moovie was cowpared to Mummy Cat – which is also fun, but in a very different way. Of course, not everyone appreciated the depths of the muck this one goes through: While Moody went with a 6, and the MooCow went with a 3.5, our Joe Turek, who was less than impressed, went with an 8.5, giving Super Badass a Stink Total of 18, which is a Stinky Average of 6.0. On the Ladder of Stink this flick ties with Peter Rottentail, which sounds about right to me. Definitely not one for Just Jenn!

You can check out the trailer HERE. And you can watch it for free, albeit in low quality and possibly edited, on YOUTUBE. You can buy the DVD at AMAZON, although to my knowledge there is no blu ray, as well as the MVD SHOP.com. You can also pick it up right from the man himself at his EBAY store. Supposedly there is a blu ray copy HERE but I dunno if its legit. Unfortunately there is no Super Badass schwag, and boy howdy there should be, but there is a review from Vitua Virtues which is cool, plus the man himself has his own Youtube channel with loads of stuff to check out. And you know you’ve made it when someone writes a song about you. Where are you Charles E. Cullen, we need you now moar than ever!
:=8O

Uh-oh, looks like Bucko has a surprise for the kiddies… :=8o

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Episode 168: Survival (2006)

April 30, 2025April 30, 2025 The MooCow

Jonathan Moody here back again. This time talking about a movie I was almost in. But I’m getting ahead of myself and will talk about that in a bit before then I wanna mention this was MY last episode of Season 6 and even though this season was a bit chaotic and crazy it was fun to try and pick a movie that no one had either seen or even heard about. So of course I like to torture poor Paul and even poor Joe Turek for some of these final episodes of the season. Joe has been a staple of our show since Season 2. We especially love having him come toward the end when things get a bit worse.

Speaking of worse… the movie we reviewed was called, “Survival”. I remember when they were in pre-production for it. This was back in the MySpace days when I was working at a very famous theme park at the time. The filmmaker Joe Francis (Not the Girls Gone Wild guy) had a MySpace Page for it with updates on what was going on with it. I had been friends with Joe since back in the day of being on the View Askew Web board. He even started his podcast and that helped launch my first podcast, “The Independent Corner” on Blog Talk Radio. Joe was the guy that got me in to B movies by telling me about the book, “Make Your Own Damn Movie” by Lloyd Kaufman. And that really helped get me in to the indie film-making spirit.

Joe one day asked me to be in Survival. He said he wrote a character for me to play as the host of this party that was happening. I originally said sure. Then I couldn’t get the time off from the amusement park job plus I really didn’t want to drive down and do it. This was before acting became more of something I really enjoy doing. Executive Producer Coleman Lannum took my part and he didn’t just play my character he played the character with my name… Jon Moody in it.

I’m not going to lie and say this was a great movie because I know the people: there were a lot of flaws. A lot of which are discussed in the movie and stuff I didn’t even think about when I first watched it. I use to have the movie on a disc that Joe himself sent to me which I was over at a friend’s house showing it to him and it somehow got lost. So this new copy is actually the real deal that you can buy on Amazon. I don’t think the movie will ever come on Blu Ray but I wouldn’t mind buying it if it did.

Ok, I’m not really sure what’s going on, but if you drink this hooch it will get better…

The film had a great cast in it like Vanelle, James Furey, Matt McClure, Ian C. King, Don Prentiss, and Including Filmmaker/Actor Adam Minarovich (we did his film Ankle Biters and have Wiseguys VS Zombies on the list for upcoming B Movies to review) makes a brief cameo in the party scene. Adam and Producer Kevin Woods had worked together for a few films; Kevin Woods was the producer of the film and co writer. He helped Joe with as much as he could. The director of photography was Joe Hamann.

I remember hearing that things were very chaotic on set and you can kind of tell with how nonsensical some of the choices they made for it were. The special effects were done by Ricky Lee Leonard who I had become friends with after this movie got made. He’s a really good special fx guy. If anything you could say some of the FX were the best parts but some of it still looked ridiculous. I just think that Joe had bigger plans thang what his budget may have allowed. But I applaud him for going out and making a movie and getting it done. Joe also has a film he did called, “The Texas Frightmare Massacre” but that one is even harder to find. If anyone has a copy of it please email it to us.

Yeah, here we are, just suvivaling. Pretty much. Yep…

Okay well the scores are in and here they are… I gave it a 9. Paul and Joe both gave it an 8.5 bringing the stink score to be a 26. That’s pretty stinky but could have been hell of a lot worse. That ties it up on the ladder of stink with Disaster Wars and Miami Connection. Not a bad triple feature if you ask me!

Anyway, that’s about it. Sorry it took so long but Paul has two more to do and we are done with Season 6 mooooving on to Season 7. Thank you all for the patience and Season 6 has been a roller coaster. We can’t wait to catch you guys up! Until next one take it away Moo Cow…

Well, this flick is so obscure and crappy that there is no trailer for it, but I did find a section of some of the moost boring mooments, cowplete with a pesky Russian overtalker right HERE. You can see the whole thing for free, if you really want to, on the Tube of You. I believe that is from Producer Kevin Woods channel. You can get the DVD pretty cheap at Amazon, but there is no blu ray of this that I know of. And that is pretty mooch that, folks, no schwag, no tee shirts, no posters, pretty much zippo – the only udder thing the MooCow cud find was a review of the film on Inside Movies Galore, so you can check that out.

Hey, look at me, guys, Imma Girl Gone MILD!

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Episode 167: Curse of the Snake Woman (2013)

February 10, 2025February 10, 2025 The MooCow

Moo everyone! So, who doesn’t wanna watch a moovie with archaeology, evil snake monsters, and strippers – ’cause I sure do!!! :=8D
And that’s just what the MooCow, Moody, and (via Zoom) our buddy Jessa Flux did, and boy howdy were there hisses, skins sheddings, and fangs bared for this one! Check out the latest episode of Indie Film Cafe for all the yappin’ and a’ yammerin’!

AH-HAAA!!! the REAL reason this moovie was made!! ;=8)

Soooo, this dope decides to rob the precious magical snake statue/charm/thingy from the local mooseum, but a fight ensures, he gets wounded, and immediately goes to the hospital to get stitched up. Oooops, I mean immediately heads over to the local strip joint (The Garden of Eden Gentleman’s Club) to get hammered. You know, as you do. Well, during the course of all this hammerin’, dude ends up dead, a stripper ends up being possessed by a snake demon (again, as you do…), and then there is a lot of dancin’, snake bitin’, bewb showins, and udder assorted hijinks that make B moovie just totally worth watching!! Eat that, boring Disney!!! Also known as Snake Club: Revenge of the Snake Woman, because one title was not enough!

Oh David Palmieri, you’ve graced us with B moovie stinkage a-plenty, including the likes of Dark World, Axegrinder, Captain Battle: Legacy War, and of course the previously covered Disaster Wars: Earthquake VS Tsunami, but this one might be the hammiest and cheesiest flick yet! David is a camera guy, director, and cinematographer who has worked on such TV shows as Son of the Beach, Lucifer, The Division, and Grey’s Anatomy, and worked on such films as Scary Movie 2, Mimic 2, Evil Alien Conquerors, and the Devil’s Rejects. So he is well steeped in stinky B moovie production! Joining him in this lark are Penthouse babe Veronica Ricci (Vampire Club, Ouija Nazi, Another Super Hero movie, Nazi Dawn) as Trinity, the stripper who becomes the snake goddess critter; and also Nina Kate (Night of the Chupacabra, Hell’s Kitty, Alpha House) as Crystal, Vanessa Sheri (Alpha House, Bachelor Night, Batman: Anarchy) as Asia, and Tracy Carr (Vertical, Fat Planet, Vampire Club) as Karma. Ever notice there are no strippers named Betty or Gertrude or Patty? There are some dudes in this flick too, but who cares about them, right? ;=8)

Ok, so there is some boobage to view in this, which is odd since snakes are generally not equipped with them, or legs either, but nevermind; the ‘club’ looks like a barber shop with a pole stuck in the middle of it, and the snake/vampire FX don’t look particularly cowvincing, especially the teeth, but who cares this is just good old fashioned stinky b moovie fun! “I love it when a guy sprays all over my face!” was never uttered with such irony. Silly, ridiculous, over the top, and just plain fun!

Ummm, say you’ve got…you got something in yer….ummm…your…nevermind….

Ok, the scores are in, and all in all Curse of the Snake Woman scored pretty well, all things cowsidered: The MooCow went with a 7, Moody a 6, and Ms. Jessa gave it a 2.5, she seemed to really have some fun with this one. Maybe she ran in to a snake or two in her dancing days… Anycow, that’s a Stinky Total of 15.5, and a Stinky Average of 5.1, putting this moovie on the Ladder of Stink right next to Stiff Jobs!

Well, you gotst yer trailerage right HERE. And if you need it in Tamil, we we got THAT too! Also also in Kannada! And Telugu!! In fact, HERE is the whole moovie for free dubbed in Hindi! NOT to be cowfused with an actual Indian snake chick moovie in Hindi called Hiss – and don’t worry, we’ll be covering that one too! ;=8) Or the Snake Girl Chinese moovie which we will also also be covering! Ummm, or the crazy Nigerian Snake Girl moovie, which I hope we will be covering! What can I say, we likes our snake chick moovies here at IFC!

Tricky to find, you can buy a copy from an Italian moovie seller right HERE, but very few udder places. It is on Prime, and also on Tubi, but hardly anywhere to get a physical copy, which is a shame. C’mon Wild Eye, give us our snake moovie!!! :=8O
No schwag for this film, but we did find a review worth checking out from Horror Asylum for the moovie.