Month: August 2024

Holy meatballs! Its Im-PASTA-ble! Its Spaghettiman!!!
:=8O
Yes, its the modern, high carb, and very tasty superhero with a side of sauce that is sweeping the nation! Well, its certainly sweeping the Latest Episode of Indie FIlm Cafe – check out what Moody, the MooCow, and special guest co-hosts Cayt Feinics and Just Jenn have to say about this wackadoodle film! :=8D

So, dorky Clark becomes a paper bag-masked mootant super hero after a run-in with a malfunctioning microwave and a bowl of spaghetti – you know, as you do, and becomes what moost be one of the genuinely unique and funny super heroes of our time. Spaghettiman can fight crime with the powers of…pasta?? Like, seriously, he can shoot strands of spaghetti out of his arms, like silk from Spiderman’s wrists. And what does this special spaghetti do? Well, not much, but it is kind of annoying. So there you have it, the slacker superhero who annoys other people to death! And, since Clark is the kind of guy who sees no reason to not get paid for his efforts, he demands moolah for any and every good deed (or bad, or neither) that he does. I mean, Spaghettiman’s gotta eat too – you expect him to eat his own spaghetti? That’s kind of gross… :=8P

Spaghettiman is the wacky brainchild of writer/director Mark Potts, who has, in addition to a bunch of shorts, also directed such feature-length films as The Stanton Family Grave Robbery (2008), S&M Lawncare (2010), and Cinema Six (2012), with his latest effort being 2018’s Cop Chronicles: Loose Cannons: The Legend of the Haj-Mirage . Clearly the man has a sense of humor and a taste for the weird and wonderful which the MooCow finds a kindred spirit. according to IMDB, the Huffington Post described Potts as a ‘Man-child”, which the MooCow cowpletely takes to heart. He was an actor and writer, and he co-founded his own production company, Singletree Productions, in 2006. AND he is an editor for the L.A. Times!

So, is a fun, funny moovie with some witty jokes, some decent fight choreography, and a lot of very good performances. Clark/Spaghettiman is played by Benjamin Crutcher , an actor who has done moostly shorts acting, appearing in such small films as Ninja Valentine (2013) and Shitting Shoes: an Ode to Pooping at Work (2013). Clearly he possesses the same wacky sense of humor as Mark Potts, and they have definitely worked together on udder projects. Dale/Shadowman is played by Winston Carter, Katie is played by Leigh Wulff, and Anthony Banner is played by Brand Rackley. Rackley, Carter and Crutcher also helped write the script. Potts also served as editor. According to IMDB 45 pounds of real spaghetti was cooked and used as FX for this production – very tasty!

I think everyone was surprised at cow good this one turned out to be! The moovie gots 2s from both Moody and the MooCow, while Cayt Feinics awarded a 1.5, and Just Jenn gave it a 2.5 – since we had an extra score, Moody bowed out, giving Spaghettiman a Total Stink Score of 6.0, and a Stinky Average of just 2! That’s very low on the Stink score, and on the Ladder of Stink Spaghettiman ties Gamebox 1.0 Attack of the Killer Doughnuts, and Drunken Wu Tang as the lowest scoring flicks IFC has ever done! WOOHOOOO!!! :=8D

Check out the trailer right HERE. You can watch it for free on Tubi and Youtube. It is also on Prime, and you can pick up the DVD on Amazon. So far the only blu ray of this film is a Region B/2 version on Amazon; There is also a supposed region-free blu ray on EBAY, but buyer beware. Udderwise, you can also get the DVD at DVDLand.com, Mighty Ape, and through Umbrella Home Entertainment.com. Get the special 12×8 tin poster from Amazon! You can find the digital poster at TrailerAddict.com, and the MoviePosterDB.com.

SageDotDotDot has a fun video review right HERE. And Matt Mungle does an interview with Spaghettiman himself! The flick is also featured on Movie Maker Magazine, and gets a review at Screen Anarchy.

The MooCow says check it out!

:=8D

Hey everybody… Jonathan Moody here back again. Sorry it’s been so long. I’ve been busy and a lot has happened in my personal life but finally I sat down and wrote this out for you all. Cause I know how much you all enjoy these (whoever actually reads these) but here it is finally. And now the MooCow can get rest easy! Anywhoo this latest IFC episode we did was the Dolph Lundgren film, “Retrograde” which I was so excited to do. I hadn’t seen it but thought we hadn’t done a Dolph flick yet we gotta find something cheesy and hopefully fun. Cheesy it was. Fun ehhhh not as much. But thankfully I had Paul Presenza and Michael McGlynn joining me. This was Michael’s first and hopefully wasn’t his last episode on Indie Film Cafe.
Here’s the story from Wikipedia:

When a deadly microorganism threatens to wipe out the entire human race, the only hope for the future of mankind is to send a special team of soldiers back in time to prevent the virus from ever coming into existence. The year is 2204. Humankind is under attack from a fast-spreading super-bug that now threatens to destroy the very fabric of human civilization. The only hope lies with Captain John Foster (Dolph Lundgren) and his elite squad of genetically resistant soldiers. Captain Foster’s mission: travel back into the past, and ensure that the first infection never happens. Now, as Captain Foster’s team races to save the world, they realize that their actions in the present could yield dire consequences for the future.

So yeah that’s pretty much the story in a nutty nutshell.

As for the film itself it starred as I said Dolph Lundgren (Rocky IV “I must break you”, I come in Peace “and you go in pieces) he didn’t really have any good memorable lines in this movie. Also stars Silvia De Santis (I am David, The Gambler who wouldn’t die, Shadows in the sun, and more); Joe Montana (Not the Football Player but the actor in The Bounre Identity, Helen of Troy, Legionnaire, and more); And Martial Artist/Actor Gary Daniels (The Expendables, Tekken, Astro, and more). With a cast like that I kind of expected it to be better than it was.

The director was Christopher Kulikowski. He has directed movies like Aurora, Pluripotent (which is a short). And The Reckoning (which is also a short). The writers were Christopher Kulikowski as well as Tom Reeve, who wrote George and the Dragon and Diggity’s Treasure, and as well as Gianluca Curti who wrote I Gilda, Bad Inclination, and A Bunch of Bastards. The cinematography was shot by Carlo Thiel who also shot A Thousand Oceans, Trouble no more, and Streak.

The movie itself was your typical most likely made for SyFy type of flick. A low rent boring Terminator but on a ship. Now Terminator on a ship sounds like it could have been really cool but sadly these guys don’t really know how to make that in to a cool thing. The acting isn’t completely atrocious but we have seen better acting. The lighting, the sound all of it was competently done and so that usually gets a few high marks and praises but with a budget of approximately 2 Million dollars it should have been competent.

Michael is one of those people that looks past a lot of flaws because it’s more indie than a Hollywood movie but still damn they really didn’t know how to make this one better. If you listen to our review of it you will hear some pretty honest thoughts on it. Paul and I usually just expect better especially when you actually have a decent budget. It just makes us respect the movies that cost 500 dollars a lot more. Maybe too many cooks spoiled the soup in this one.

Well with that being said now comes the fun part where I let you know what we all rated it and what it ranks up on the ladder of stink next to. First off Paul and I gave it a 6. Meaning we didn’t hate the movie really but we have seen a lot better. And Michael was kind enough to give it a 5.5. That’s still in the meh range. Which is a Total Stink Score total of 17.5, and a Stinky Average of 5.8.. Do we recommend this movie? Probably if you are a Dolph fan and you haven’t seen it yet. Or you just need something in the background. On the Ladder of Stink it’s the only one there. This is the first and probably won’t be the last 17.5

Anyway thank you all for checking this one out… we’ll try not to keep you guys waiting for so long next time. I mean we have so many more to catch up on. This was all my fault. I totally apologize. Anyhow… The MooCow is about to tell you guys how you can find it and if there’s any kind of merch for it… take it away, Moo Cow…

Moo everyone, glad to be back! So, we gots trailerage for dis film right HERE. You can also view the moovie for freebies on YOUTUBE, as well as Tubi. Grab yerself a DVD or Blu Ray copy at Uncle Amazon! Or for you cheapskates out there (and I one of you!) you can pick it up cheeeeep re-sale at Ebay. So CineMaterial.com has a bunch of different digital posters, if u want them, as does Movie Posters 2.com; MoviestillDB.com has posters and pics from the moovie as well!The Action Elite did a write up on this flick that was pretty good, and so does Spiral of Hope, and Ramboraph4life does a video review. Dats about it for schwag, folks, but I did find a podcast review at the Ultimate Dolph Guide.